senior, old age, second childhood, sickness and death, ain't we got fun.

Tuesday, January 26, 2016

RETRO DON'S POST


Wednesday, December 29, 2010

DR. STEVE, U. S. DEFENSE DEPT. GENIUS


for thirty years dr. steve worked on the development of the door wedge. finally finding out that it was already invented he became an alcoholic and died in an officer's club restroom. in addition, he now was older and no longer attracted the skanks at the bar in a physical way. life was not worth continuing. visions of fame in the scientific community vanished. so sad.

his concept of the wedge developed over many years supported of course by tax payer money. in the beginning he tried bowling balls but found they rolled away from the door. the mathematics of his findings can be found in his technical report, NON-LINEAR FRICTION ANALYSIS.

later on he tried blocks of ice which melted and also slipped away from the door.

almost successful was the use of computer hard drives but the exposed circuitry scratched the floor.


INVENTOR OF THE WEDGE
finally coming up with a triangular shaped rubber device he was let down and depressed upon finding he was only 45,000 years late. so close. beaten out by a neanderthal man in a cave

his boss said that the U. S. DEFENSE DEPT. is always seeking new and innovative methods and he provides the environment for scientific inquiry and growth. he praised dr. steve for his harvard-like new england accent and for always carrying a manila folder around when not at his desk.

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Friday, January 22, 2016


RETRO DON'S POST

and going brain dead

CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE

i must have slipped into an alternative universe, or my wardrobe sucked me into narnia or did i go through the looking glass. at any rate somehow the phrase corporations are people keeps pounding in my head. this is most bizarre and surreal. i wonder how this could have happened?

corporations are people...corporations are people...corporations are people...

i must have hit my head because this would be ridiculous. concussions and also old age cause delusions.

somehow in this time warp anomaly the supreme court must have had something to do with this and they did. y'know the supreme court is made up of old people and i wonder how reality based they are.

in this realm soylent green is people. i guess i may have gotten into the movie somehow.

sooooo, both corporations and soylent green are people. of course.

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Tuesday, January 19, 2016

RETRO POST:

Wednesday, July 4, 2012

its now two years since my doctor officially declared me dead. so i fired the doctor. science is so wonderful. y'know, bumble bees can't fly.

its not that there are not enough scientists and engineers in this country, its that there are too many of them. most of poor quality. separating the "wheat from the chafe" is difficult or impossible. having worked with such people in our defense dept. i can assure you that at least 5% of them are good. the rest of them should be working in mines or factories in some janitorial job. changing a light bulb is a challenge.

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Monday, January 18, 2016

JUST SAYIN'

just finished watching, "office space", the greatest movie of all time.

its about working in an office with idiots like most white collar workers do. oddly they don't seem to notice. its working in DOD. the bosses and managers and officers know less than a brick wall. they can give orders or take orders but can't actually do anything. viagra cannot fix their problem.

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YES EVEN AFTER LONG TIIME RETIREMENT I'M STILL STEAMING ABOUT DOD MANAGEMENT INCOMPETENCE

RETRO DON'S POST


Monday, December 27, 2010

WINTER WEIGHT ANALYSIS

(WITH APOLOGIES TO THE HARD WORKING AND COMPETENT PEOPLE IN THE U. S. DEFENSE DEPT. (WHO ARE SWALLOWED UP BY THE MEAT MACHINE AND INCOMPETENTS AMONG MANAGEMENT AND HUMAN RESOURCES)

using the latest U. S. DEFENSE DEPT. scientific, and mathematical techniques including multi-variable regurgitation, analysis of deviates, divergence of sputum induction, dr. professor meatball's theorem, and an embarassingly large amount of money for useless contractor salesmen we are investigating the cause of increased winter weight among executives, officers, and the skanks of the defense dept.


so far it appears that eating, drinking, and not getting off their fat asses is the major cause. talking, flirting, and hanging out in officer's clubs and the rest room does not burn body fat.

dr. professor bozo meatball, leader of this program and graduate of (ugh) new jersey colleges and universities has devised a complex statistical method using only your fingers and toes. he considers himself a genius with degrees: ms in oral activities, phd in bar hopping, ahole studies, and draft dodging.
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Thursday, January 14, 2016

LIFE IMITATING ART

tonight's debate will partially be a recreation of "alice in wonderland":

donald trump as the mad hatter
ted cruz as the march hare
jeb bush as the dormouse
carly florina as alice

"Chapter 7: A Mad Tea-Party
There was a table set out under a tree in front of the house, and the March Hare and the Hatter were having tea at it: a Dormouse was sitting between them, fast asleep, and the other two were using it as a cushion, resting their elbows on it, and the talking over its head. `Very uncomfortable for the Dormouse,’ thought Alice; `only, as it’s asleep, I suppose it doesn’t mind.............’ "

life imitating fiction or vice versa.

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Tuesday, January 12, 2016

TRUMP NOT A CITIZEN

trump's eligibility is in doubt.

my investigation to date reveals that Power Girl (real name Kara Zor-L, cousin to superman,. native Kryptonian. Her origins have changed several times in continuity when the Multiverse was erased. Current alternate identity: Supergirl and mother of our donald trump born don-el. this proves that he is an alien and explains his super powers which he can attest to.

my investigators will continue to search for the truth as they did with president obama.

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Monday, January 11, 2016

ON DONALD TRUMP

currently researching his background. discovered he is an alien from the planet krypton. his birth name was don-el, a relative of kal-el. will keep you informed as investigation continues.

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RETRO 2010

MOON ROCKS

i'm expected to believe that some guy who acquired a bunch of what they call college credits in geology because he wanted to avoid the draft for 'nam and because of his parents' profitable lawn service walks out on his lawn and among the gazillion varied and unique rocks he discerns that one popped off the moon. whoa, thats a leap of faith and a lot to digest.

my theory is (y'know what buffalo chips are?) that those ufos when they land (usually in nevada) empty their - ummmm -- you know - moon rocks and fly away.




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Sunday, January 10, 2016

JUST REALLY BORING STUFF


PARTIALLY REVISED - RETRO DON'S POST

ROLLING STONE, STORY:

Army Deploys Psy-Ops on U.S. Senators

By Michael Hastings

February 23, 2011 11:55 PM ET

"The U.S. Army illegally ordered a team of soldiers specializing in "psychological operations" to manipulate visiting American senators into providing more troops and funding for the war ........"

why is this a surprise? every nitwit in the defense dept. thinks he is saving and ruling the country. my wife's hair stylist (alcoholic) husband came into the salon one day and said the "gulf of tonkin" incident was not too important because he was not called to a meeting. amazingly, the self-importance of defense dept. personnel goes right down to the bottom.

right now i am controlling your mind by my thoughts; thinking, thinking ----- "meet me at the officer's club at 1800 hours".

see, you are now under my control.

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Posted by granpa don at 11:19 AM
Tuesday, February 22, 2011

just sayin':

the rko chester, right next to west farms square, where my bro' in law worked as an usher in the '40s was right under the el which does not enhance its image but it was a nice theater.

diagonally across the street was a ..mmmmm.. pizza place. mmmm... pizza.

one night while pizzaing with friends a young lady about my age about 16 sat down next to me at our booth and i didn't have the sense to walk her home. stupid is forever. poor me.

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Posted by granpa don at 9:00 AM
Monday, February 21, 2011

179TH AND VYSE, BRONX, NY (PART XXXX): LIFE BEFORE DEATH IN (ugh) NEW JERSEY


in the early '40s it was fairly safe for a tween to travel the subway system around nyc. i was only abused once very briefly (and walked away) on the subway system which scared me but here i am. perhaps - probably the guy moved to sussex county new jersey where he belongs and got a job in the human resources department at my defense intallation. who knows? DOD PLEASE NOTE just sayin'.

during high school, assignments requiring attendance at some of the nyc museums in manhattan was required . so i knew my way around nyc.

for my 13th birthday a great uncle gave me $20, probably the rough equivalent of at least $200 today. i went downtown and squandered this fortune in one day. i went to a penny arcade, took a tour of nbc studios, the museum of science and industry which was in the basement at 30 rock (which no one remembers but me), bought some luminous paint (musta been radioactive.), had lunch, and other stuff, returning home broke.

yes i should have turned this money over to my parents and never seen it again. they would have done the same things i did only without me.

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Saturday, January 9, 2016


RETRO DON'S POST

Friday, February 25, 2011

179TH AND VYSE, BRONX, NY (PART XXXXI): LIFE BEFORE DEATH IN (ugh) NEW JERSEY

(continued)


CRIME AND PUNISHMENT, AMERICAN STYLE -----

with many ex-gis home after the bastardgerman warii, it was inevitable that our guys would initially be hanging out at the corner candy store with nothing much to do. one day a police car rolled up and caught some of them red handed pitching pennies. they were cited or something and will go the rest of their lives with this stain on their record.

some other major crimes at the time; like the time i had to appear in court for ball playing at the beach and the time me and artie were picked up for talking to each other in the street. they let us go after driving us a few streets away. i'm sure that artie's telling them of our right of assembly under the constitution of the united states had a big influence on them.

THANKS TO THE EVER VIGILANT NEW YORK CITY POLICE DEPARTMENT A MAJOR CRIME WAVE WAS AVERTED.

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Friday, January 8, 2016

RETRO DON'S POST - ON FISHING

FROM: 179TH AND VYSE, BRONX, NY (PART XXXXIII): LIFE BEFORE DEATH IN (ugh) NEW JERSEY

FISHING (UGH)

my dad loved fishing. on his one day off, most of the time he went on boats to long island sound. fortunately for me, he rarely took me along. he awoke me early-early in the morning. (groan). first we would pick up some great coffee and sandwiches (the best part) from his store. then usually we would go over to westchester avenue (near the el) where the bronx river widened out to enter the sound and board one of the fishing boats moored there. twice we went out to long island via lirr (early, early, early in the morning).

i know its me not you. i find fishing boring and tedious. exposure to water, the elements, the uncertainties of waterways, and the motion of the boat do less than nothing for me. tying hooks, cutting up worms or other bait and skewering it is gross. sorry dad, i just can't hack it. you're the man!

on one occasion i reeled in the day's prize fish. my dad split the prize money with a friend we were with. i'm still waiting for my share. who holds a grudge?

fishing sucks.

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Monday, January 4, 2016


RETRO DON'S POST

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

ON PENSIONS, BUSINESSMEN, CABBAGES, AND KINGS.

-"The time has come," the Walrus said,
"To talk of many things:
Of shoes—and ships—and sealing-wax—
Of cabbages—and kings—
And why the sea is boiling hot—
And whether pigs have wings."


in retrospect my guaranteed pension was the pot-o-gold at the end of the rainbow. the carrot at the end of the stick. if it were not there, working with nitwit scientists, engineers, and secretarial skanks (in a new jersey defense dept. installation) would have been immeasureably more difficult than it was.


in addition if the govt. had paid the actual interest rate on the pension funds there would be no problems. if in some states like .. umm .. new jersey the politicians had made their obligated contributions there would be no problem.

meanwhile, business men waiting for their next victim to step into their business web while watching fox news are feeling sorry for themselves imagining that they are working. they're upset over these pensions as they balance their two sets of books waiting for their homestead rebates. i have two words for them: ---- ---.

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RETRO DON'S POST 2012

today's fictitious item is dedicated to a DOD co-worker and his friend:

LIGHTS UP

Co-worker: my good friend fell down a flight of stairs and died .... sob, sob, whimper.

Me: thats so sad. how did that happen?

C: he was at a party and had a few drinks and stuff. he stepped outside to get some fresh air when it happened.

M: so he was drunk?

C: he also had some recreational drugs. very little.

M: just a few drinks and drugs?

C: we both got our phd's at the same time. he was so smart.

M: sooooo, he was very smart and was drinking and taking drugs and staggered outside for some fresh air and fell down a flight of stairs and died and thats why i should feel sorry for him and you.

C: he was just having fun .... whimper, sob, whine, whine, whine.

M: apparently he was not smart enough. i guess they'll give phds to anyone. all you have to do is pay them money and sit on your butt through hundreds of class hours. these things happen when you drink and take drugs. i guess you can make a (faux) silk purse from a sow's ear as they say. suck it up.

C: whine, whine, whine, whimper, ..................................................

LIGHTS DOWN

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Saturday, January 2, 2016


FRANK SINATRA SINGS FOR DONALD TRUMP

i saw this in the movie house during wwii - "the house i live in".



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AMERICA CAN BE GREAT AGAIN

sorta patriotic bent today.






RETRO DON'S POST 2012


can't wait for the tea party to take over. i clearly remember the good old days when we didn't need money, mainly because we had no money.


dusty unpaved roads were so much fun to travel. passing hooverville towns were always interesting to view as your model T, rolled by.

when the tea party takes over it will cost you a nickel each for a subway trip, a phone call, two rolls, and a cup of coffee - yea.

in the good old days health care was free. you went over to fordham hospital and died. simple and easy.

we don't need any stinkin' signal lights, schools, or fire depts. volunteers can take care of everything just don't count on me. i don't volunteer for anything unless it involves water skiing.

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Thursday, December 31, 2015

ITS BREAKUP NIGHT

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MOOD MUSIC



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BREAKUP NIGHT

it is said that this night is the most popular night of the year to breakup a relationship. of course it is a bad night to have a relationship breakup. the winter is just beginning, its cold, icy, snowy, and there are few daylight hours for the next couple of months. and yet more couples split or start splitting on this night.

why do i mention this? because it is an important college ritual.

for me it was the start of the end of two college dating relationships i had. one was when my date wound up sitting on my friend raymond's lap and she didn't understand why i was angry. the other was when another date on another new year's eve date was real happy when a married guy with wife present sorta' grabbed her and kissed her. i guess that they were flirting and i didn't need any additional problems in my life. both relationships went down the toilet soon after.

walking home alone (free, free, free at last) on a dump night a week later i felt elated in the very cold, clear january night with brilliant stars in the sky and the exhilarating cold air in my lungs i was really happy to be by myself with not a care in the world.


am i going to wish you a happy new year? no, you may have whatever kind of year you want. you're on your own.


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RETRO DON'S POST

NEW YEARS EVE: WHAT IS IT AND WHY SHOULD I CARE?

fortunately i'll go to sleep tonight around 8 pm. no longer am i obligated to attend mind deadening parties dying slowly in my chair with other married zombies losing IQ points and brain cells and hearing quantities of old wives tales and other misinformation.

haven't figured out what we're supposed to be celebrating on new year's eve: the end of another disastrous year; the beginning of a new disastrous year; that we are still alive for no reason at all; that when we subtract our birth year we are a year older; that your unemployment benefits have run out; that we are with friends who would sell you out for a cold potato.

for young people there are other new years eve events: its a good night for breakups; for a more ...ummm... physical relationship; for a less physical relationship; looking forward to college graduation and the end of your good life.

and my favorite - for the media and financial news for next year; continue making up your own facts; telling lies repeatedly for lesser intellects to believe; distorting events for kickbacks and payoffs.

and for small business: continue not paying collected sales or other taxes; may next year be the end of paying anything for hired help. they should be happy for the rainbow.

lets hope we can accomplish all we desire.


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Tuesday, December 29, 2015

YES - BIG LOSER FOR PREZ.

sure looking forward for trump the loser being president. attacking hillary, bill, christie, new hampshire leader and its publisher is reminiscent of wwii germany attacking the u.s.a,. russia, england and others and then being surprised when they lost only a crazy guy and followers would do it..

actually he's a nyc street kid and should be treated as such.

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Saturday, December 26, 2015

RETRO DON'S POST

PET CAT FOUND

they found my grand daughter's cat in a shed behind a house up the street after four days. he apparently hadn't eaten anything. up to now, food has magically appeared in a clean, neat dish. he probably never thought that he should or could find or catch food -- huh?.

where was the food? where is my dish? i know it will show up. it always has. i don't know what's wrong. ooooh, there's a disgusting mouse that just ran by. isn't that bird pretty. where is my food? i don't need them. i can make it on my own even if its a little chilly except i don't know where my food is.

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Thursday, December 24, 2015

REALLY GETTING TIRED OF THE LATEST NEW COMPUTERS AND LAPTOPS

every few minutes they try to sell you something.

"this is hal your laptop. i'm here to help you today.
you can purchase this handy salad flipper for only ......."

yes we can make america great again by restoring privacy and kicking out all hucksters both human and robotic. republican presidential contenders first.

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RETRO DON'S POST

Friday, December 24, 2010

XMAS AND XMAS EVE

tonight (i guess) is the night baby jesus flies up your chimney to heaven. no, i think that's later. for some obscure reason children are showered with gifts tomorrow to celebrate this occasion. their parents who have toiled and sweated all year long to pay for these brats' presents will tell their undeserving spawn that they were delivered by a messenger of god. they will get a lot of masochistic satisfaction as their progeny are contemptuous of the whole event.

tomorrow afternoon will be the big final celebration dinner filled with alcoholic beverages, salty, fatty, and sweet foods. the then fulfilled parents, like salmon at the end of their run, will grab their chests, and fall head first into the dessert.

have a happy parturition, procreation, fertility day.

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the xmas story seems to revolve around a couple named mary and joseph in bethlehem in territory that has currently been taken over by the palestinians. mary, pregnant from some unknown source (as she told her husband) is about to give birth but no palestinians step forward to be of any assistance. as usual (if they are there at all) they have their hands out but contribute nothing - maybe just trouble.

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Wednesday, December 23, 2015

WHAT I LEARNED WHILE LIVING IN (UGH) NEW JERSEY

the german bund is alive and well in northern new jersey. if you are black, italian, jewish, muslim, et al. stay out of sussex county.

only straight laced people seem to be in northern new jersey until they are tested at the officers' club bar.

if your husband gets a job in nyc and has a cute secretary, he will leave one morning and never come back.

stone walls that weep are miracles of god. the media censors the news of miracles.

officer's wives are drunks.

prayer helps at least 10%. whatever that means.

gossips and the ignorant are just as flawed among engineers, scientists, teachers, and other professionals as among uneducated new arrivals from eastern, western, and southern europe.

LOVE IT OR LEAVE IT. prefer to leave it.

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RETRO DON'S POST (2013)

CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE

i must have slipped into an alternative universe, or my wardrobe sucked me into narnia or did i go through the looking glass. at any rate somehow the phrase corporations are people keeps pounding in my head. this is most bizarre and surreal. i wonder how this could have happened?

corporations are people...corporations are people...corporations are people...

i must have hit my head because this would be ridiculous. concussions and also old age cause delusions.

somehow in this time warp anomaly the supreme court must have had something to do with this and they did. y'know the supreme court is made up of old people and i wonder how reality based they are.

in this realm soylent green is people. i guess i may have gotten into the movie somehow.

sooooo, both corporations and soylent green are people. of course.

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Tuesday, December 22, 2015

HOW THE HELL DID I GET THROUGH COLLEGE

RETRO DON'S POST -- ORIGINAL STUFF FROM DEC. 2013

TERM PAPER

i lay down in bed last night.

realizing that a term paper was due this morning i knew that i needed my computer, paper, and pen to prepare my hand written paper.

pondering this revelation, it occurred to me that i may be dreaming.

if i weren't dreaming what was the worst thing that could happen to an old man if i didn't do the paper?

then a miracle happened i awoke.


FINAL EXAMS

in addition to dreaming of term papers due the next morning i also dream of final exams that i have not prepared for. having gone through life on the wing and a prayer and really not prepared for anything, i have managed to survive. no wonder i have bad dreams about final exams and term papers.


MORE FINAL EXAM NIGHTMARES

final exam at 10 am today.

i don't remember that.

its in contracts.

can't remember the last time i attended class.yes, i remember now - i think.

i should have prepared.

i'm on campus now.

students and staff are walking this way and that. what building, and room is it in?

i'd better go over to the administration building and find out.

yikes, its 9:30 already.

pushing my way through crowds on the hill heading towards the building.

there's a sign on the door.

it says the admnistration building has been moved to the other campus.

i'm on the subway now heading towards the other campus.

no i'm not. this train is going into the borough of queens.

the train is now traveling above ground.

all that can be seen is the shrubbery along the countryside.

i'll get off at the next stop and crossover to the otherside to get back to the city.

at the next stop there is a bus waiting that goes into the bronx over the whitestone bridge.

the bus ia a local and makes many stops.

finally arriving at west farms square.

home at last.

seems that thats where i wanted to be in the first place.

MUST DO COLLEGE. HOW ELSE CAN I SURVIVE ?


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Monday, December 21, 2015

NEW AMERICA WITH ARM BANDS, SHIRTS, AND SYMBOLS

can't wait for the new administration. donald trump and daffy duck with the munchkin congress and they'll be singing:

Ha ha ha / Ho ho ho / And a couple of tra la las / That's how we laugh the day away / In the merry old land of the U S A.

wait. i may be in an alternate universe.

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RETRO DON'S POST:

Wednesday, December 11, 2013

IMPROVING LITERATURE

at three this morning i was thinking of blanche DuBois saying, " .... I have always depended on the kindness of strangers."

always happy to help out fellow writers i submit the following as improvemrnts to Tennessee Williams line:

" .... I have always depended on the kindness of the internal revenue service."

" .... I have always depended on the kindness of wall street stockbrokers."

" .... I have always depended on the kindness of rotweilers."

" .... I have always depended on the kindness of engineers."

" .... I have always depended on the kindness of car dealers."

" .... I have always depended on the kindness of subordinates."

" .... I have always depended on the kindness of management."

" .... I have always depended on the kindness of college boys."

" .... I have always depended on the kindness of boa constrictors and politicians."

to the writers of america: you are welcome.

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Thursday, December 17, 2015

POOR JEB --- LEFT STANDING ALONE AT THE DANCE

just thinkin' of the jebster. he reminds me of the mythical guy who hangs around at the dance waiting to pick up the last remaining desperate woman. sometimes it probably works out.

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Wednesday, December 16, 2015

AMERICA CAN BE GREAT AGAIN, YEA

the republican party should put out a musical album saluting american greatness of yesteryear. suggestions
of items on the album are:

Brother Can You Spare A Dime? 1932 Rudy Vallee

Where Have All The Flowers Gone.. (1963) marlene dietrich

I'm forever blowing bubbles (1919) Burr & Campbell

When Johnny Comes Marching Home NANA MOUSKOURI

Green Fields of France by John McDermott

DANNY BOY' 1962 MAUREEN O'HARA

we'll meet again (british world war II song) Vera Lynn

Pennies From Heaven Sarah Vaughan

Erika - famous german marching song of WW2

On The Good Ship Lollipop Shirley Temple


and others ----

thanks to youtube for these references.

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Monday, December 14, 2015

THE INNOCENT AND NOT SO SMART INVESTORS

somehow many people today have been brainwashed to believe that you can always make money by buying stock (lol).

i think part of this is due to the belief that people think that the collapsing stock market is a liberal plot.

an army officer i know thinks its a badge of honor to lose money in the stock market like he just failed to wipe out an isis battalion but had to retreat bravely - sure yawn.

they are losing money on what they were told was a sure thing (rising stock prices) but they went broke. must be those liberals. no wonder they're angry.. my grandparents in the 1920s knew it was a gamble. today's young crowd thinks the market is a sure thing. just split the stock ... ummm ... tear it in half and you'll make a lot of money.

in 1941 my grandfather while babysitting me took me up to a place where you could day trade for small amounts. we were there a short time. he told me to watch the old time lighted stock ticker display for X (us steel) while he presumably made his bet. we left later. he must have lost his money. he was always broke.

you don't think investors are stupid or something? or its just something to do?

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Monday, December 7, 2015

REMEMBER PEARL HARBOR

i'm surprised that anyone remembers this day. a day that will "live in infamy". i guess infamy lasts about five years.

the japs are great and so much fun.

sorry we dropped the bomb. it slipped.

ok -- would you rather have a lot of japs killed or lose your life invading japan. wait --- i'm thinking......

a friend of mine's brother was killed landing on a pacific island weeks before THE BOMB was dropped. i'm sure he had no problem with the above possible choice.

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FIRST KING OF THE UNITED STATES

dateline january 2117:

king donald I, master of nothingness ascended the throne 100 years ago this month at his inauguration. it was the people's desire to devolve to the level of islamic extremists. a form of fighting fire with fire. today we are terrorist free primarily because of the artificial intelligence of the iPhone LCCCXVIII. our new king, coronated today, JEB! III will certainly strengthen us. DEATH TO THE EVIL ONES!!!!!

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dateline dec. 7 2015

repubs are trying to get rid of trump:

I don't understand how you can swift boat trump because he never did anything. you'll have to attack his obvious nothingness. his nothingness is less than others' nothngness. he's more nothing than a black hole/outer space/my bank account/my comments/the invisible man/my job/obama's isis strategy/gop's isis strategy/faux news commentary (exclude shepard smith)/arab sincerity ------ never mind.

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Tuesday, December 1, 2015

MY FAMILY'S GREAT INHERITANCE

soon after i retired from my govt. DOD job my childless widowed brooklyn uncle died. i was the only person of a large extended family with rights in the united states (yea).

i sorta' ran around getting legal documents and collecting his liquid assets. distributed them to the nine canadian siblings/spouses plus one neice.

my dumbass uncle j---- threatened to get his own lawyer in canada like a canadian lawyer would want to get involved in such a small estate with so many heirs. he like his older son always has to be in the spotlight although probably the dumbest in the family and in spite of being almost blowhard sociopaths. he was highly insulted when told he had no standing in the usa since he was an illegal alien. why do canadians think they're part of the usa? his share was about $10k. my only american and canadian born first cousins do not have any inheritance rights concerning my deceased uncle because their fathers were still alive and canadian citizens.

this was a good activity for me as i had nothing to do and was getting antsy.

only me and one cousin living in brooklyn went to the funeral. i was a bit concerned after paying for the funeral as i had no way of knowing whether i would be reimbursed. not only didn't i expect repayment from all the loving relatives but outside of my cousin no one else showed up. she said there were assets in his estate that would cover costs but i don't recall that she reached for her wallet. even my wife was a little concerned. i assured her everything would be just fine ---- absolutely --- and it was.

its good to be an american.



The stars and the stripes, they are calling,
Three cheers for the Red,
Three cheers for the Red,
Three cheers for the Red, White, and Blue!

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Saturday, November 21, 2015

GOING CRAZY AT THE HOSPITAL

i have always thought of myself as perfectly rational but last year being sick, and under heavy medication, i suffered from illusions (delusions?). in retrospect it was interesting.

although i now know the illusions did not exist, they were perfectly real and explainable to myself.

1. there was a black web which my visitors walked through and did not notice. i explained it to myself that this was a major hospital where all sorts of strange experiments are probably occurring. i thought the hospital was probably projecting this web only to me.

2. a light fixture was being fed paper and printing a variety of pictures (art works, maps, pornography, architectural drawings, etc.). these pictures were moving across the ceiling. i did not understand why others did not see this. i finally believed that they were not concentrating enough. although my daughter told me later that delusions are not
uncommon in hospitals.


i must mention the night i wanted to teleport myself home although that was mainly a realistic dream. i was sorta' partially awake. in order to actually teleport myself home i really unhooked catheters and tubes and stuff to prepare for my escape finally setting off an alarm to which a nurse responded. thinking that i would be at least sent to prison for this brazen offense i offered the nurse a bribe not to mention this event. she said she had to report it. i was doomed, doomed, doomed.

the next morning i noticed i had not moved an inch. my teleportation efforts had failed. no one knew of my adventure or cared.

moral: STAY AWAY FROM UNNECESSARY MEDICAL CARE.

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Thursday, November 19, 2015

NEW YORK TIMES TOO SMART FOR ME

just quit the nyt. they're just too fussy for my comments, must be too smart, civilized, sophisticated, intellectual, bleeding heart, whatever.

they might say Abdelhamid Abaaoud was such a nice boy/good to his mother/sense of humor/ always smiling/charitable/kissed babies. he understandably turned radical when someone kicked his dog/didn't tip him at the pizza place/charged him on the subway/metro/cut him off in traffic/women didn't succumb to his charms/failed to get his welfare check/lithium.

when properly explained suicide bombing is totally understandable. what else could he do?

i think all the good muslims will have to redeem their reputation on their own. its not my fault and its not my job. whining doesn't help. just do it.

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Wednesday, November 18, 2015

AMERICAN MUSLIMS -- WE'LL ALWAYS HAVE PARIS

yes - we'll always have paris.
i know all american muslims are nice family people but its unavoidable to think "suicide crazy bombers". how can you fix it?????
try joining our armed forces. i dunno? can we trust you??? i dunno.
you look honest. i dunno.
you'll have to figure it out yourself.
we'll always have paris.


i still can't figure out how such a small number of crazy, superstitious, delusional, ignorant people has everyone looking under their beds for suicide bombers and arguing among themselves like "the three stooges" ??????????

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Sunday, November 15, 2015

MY GODS - YOUR GODS SUCK

just to let the world know that my religious beliefs are the only ones that have any credibility.

i believe in a multiple spirit system which makes perfect sense to me. the main and dominant ones are:

1. DUMDUM - of male persuasion, representing dumb luck and totally out of control, prefers bar hopping, and women for company, is on vacation most the time, and is the main alpha spirit dominating all.

2. LADY LUCK - beautiful and fickle.

3. MURPHY - the murphy of murphy's law. as you know -- anything that can go wrong will go wrong.


there are lesser spirits vying for recognition. too bad, suck it up.
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Wednesday, November 11, 2015

MY NY TIMES COMMENT

i am really surprised that the nyt actually put this in their comment section. not being or even attempting to be a (lol) mensa member and having written this past my usual bedtime i didn't expect this to meet their criteria for comments.


CONCERNING POLITICIAN'S ALLEGATIONS-----

just adding my 2 cents.

in my day we called these scenarios grand mother's tales and the people that told them were gossips.

although (i think) occam's. razor the simplest explanation for some event may be most probable (as you know) is among an infinite number of possible stories. no one can possibly know all the facts leading up to and causing an event.

in my humdrum world i've heard stories that a relative supported his parents. partially true but mostly false. his parents mostly supported him. i don't know all the details.

a friends house was purchased by his grandmother/father's inheritance/plain frugal living/winning the lottery/unscrupulous mortgage co./murdering the previous owner/drug money.

he broke up with his girlfriend because he was a womanizer/she found a better guy/he didn't trust her/she got a great job in L. A./he has a terminal disease/she needs dental work/he joined special forces/she was married to another as was he/it was mutual.

that's my point. we cannot know the truth and we are all subjected to made up stuff.

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Tuesday, November 10, 2015

SUGGESTIONS FOR LESS OFFENSIVE NAME FOR SYRIAN CONCENTRATION CAMP IN GERMANY

germany trying to escape the stigma caused by them when murdering people in their ... ummmm ... concentration camps should try to lighten up by changing the name for the flood of muslim middle easterners.

suggestions are:

mideast assembly

comrades society

friends village

fraternity lodge

buddy site



work ----- macht --oops-- makes you ----- frei ---- oops happy.

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Friday, November 6, 2015

MY ROSEBUD MOMENT

in the movie citizen kane's last word was, rosebud, which was the name on his sled when he was a kid, presumably his happiest time.

my "rosebud" moment occurred in a dream the other night. although i'm still alive, i dreamed that i received a gift of an apple ii computer with disk drives. i owned an apple i in about 1980. this apparently was my "rosebud". in the dream i was very happy for this gift. i was only about 40 years old when i actually had my apple i. yes, apple i. dreams are not always totally true.

loved that machine. didn't get a new computer for about 10 years. wow i was really out of date.

in those days computers did not try to sell you stuff. now i can't escape the hucksters. i had to return a dell because i couldn't escape salesmen and ads.

in the good old days computers actually could do stuff.

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Wednesday, November 4, 2015

SUPERJEB

superjeb can do and fix anything. "Faster than a speeding bullet! More powerful than a locomotive! Able to leap tall buildings at a single bound!"

"Look! Up in the sky!"
"It's a bird!"
"It's a plane!"
"It's Superjeb!"

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Monday, November 2, 2015

ON CHARITY AND CHARITABLE ACTIONS

nothing like the appreciation you get when you are charitible. the recipients never think you gave enough.

my wife (about 20 years ago) told me that a volunteer was needed to escort a (sorta') refugee family from our new jersey town to another where they could get english lessons. the place was several towns away on the commuter line and a walk of five streets. being frugal i never expected that this would cost me anything. i volunteered because it might be an interesting adventure.

i drove them from where they stayed to the train station and bought tickets expecting to be repaid. they were totally disinterested in the new jersey (ugh) landscape as we rode by,

after we got off the train the family wanted to take a cab on my dime. by this time i was becoming a bit annoyed at them. who the hell do these beggars think they are? for homeless refugees they sure have nerve. i already unexpectedly got stuck with their transportation and train tickets. angered i told them we would walk the five streets.

in my town other people (crazy do-gooders) tried to accommodate them with stuff. they wanted one family's living room set. their son wanted to be a doctor and i had some recent books from some advanced college biology courses i was taking for my amusement. they turned them down presumably because they were a year old.

i waited at the facility until they were finished and brought them home.

on another occasion i brought some stuff to a church in morristown for the down and out and some were presumably homeless. they got a free lunch and some services, if requested. i carried some things for one of the people. that person i realized was healthier and stronger than me (suckerrrrr!).

when leaving one of the people started cursing me. i know that they were not normal but taking abuse is not one of my strong points.

no good deed goes unpunished. i must control my finer instincts.

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Thursday, October 29, 2015

BACK ROOM TRUMP AND CARSON

i can see trump and carson running for president and vice president:

trump: between us we own over 50% of the republican vote. i'd like you to be my veep.

carson: ho hum - ok. but we may lose the election.

trump: i know but we'll be written in history. you can't buy history.

carson: true - lets go for it. yawn.....

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Tuesday, October 27, 2015

ON BEING OLD

y'know everyone concentrates on the downside of being old. there's an upside which most ignore.

on the upside:

you get out of doing trivial demeaning activities.

"take out the garbage". "i''m too old and weak".

you can fake stuff

my arm hurts.

never be embarrassed

your pants fell down.   who cares.

avoiding visitors

bratty children with colds and other people keep out.

get out of doing anything

sorry, i forgot.

pretend you're deaf

huh?

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Sunday, October 25, 2015

BECAUSE OF MAUREEN O'HARA'S DEATH AT 95

i am recommending the following films whose stories involve persons of irish descent.

"only the lonely"

"the catered affair"

"a tree grows in brooklyn"

movies i liked with interesting people.

bye, have a nice day.

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Friday, October 23, 2015

HILLARY BLOWS THEM AWAY

the republican benghazi committee made total fools of themselves interrogating hillary yesterday in the most ungentlemanly way. they have no shame she was there for about 12 hours taking indiscriminate republican fire. up to yesterday i felt reluctant to go to the polls but repub bad behavior and hillary's clear and honest answers convinced me to vote for her.

the committee convinced me that they beat their wives.

frequent breaks by the men showed that men need 30 minute breaks before they can go again. y'know what i'm sayin'?

she was under oath i believe so her testimony must have been ok.

women are certainly stronger and smarter than men especially republican oafs as demonstrated.

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Thursday, October 22, 2015

RYAN SUPPORTED BY SO CALLED FREEDOM PARTY (NOT!)

freedom (ughh) party becoming civilized? where's cliven bundy when you need him?

btw: i'm sending jeb!'s pac 100 million dollars today. he needs it to fix the election and the supreme court. where's my checkbook? go jeb!. go jeb!. just go.

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Tuesday, October 20, 2015

CHARTER SCHOOL BLUES

a class from a local charter school (in ..ugh... nj) would arrive and meet at the local YMCA. they arrive in a rusted out, unsafe appearing vehicle.

the ...ummm... so-called teachers consisted of one seedy looking older man who seemed to mostly to sit and watch the .ummm.. activities and two dried up women who might qualify for wicked witches from OZ or macbeth. none of them appeared to be qualified.

charter schools are profit making sorta' faux educational businesses. much of the time the kids played dodge ball. a game where they try to kill each other with a ball. very educational for future republicans.

it was interesting that the shortest kid, a wise ass tried to insult and demean me. it must be that he never came up against an adult who responded to him for fear of losing their job.

well this should be fun i thought. a few choice remarks about losing his hair and death could ruin his life and could make him sufficiently neurotic to be in need of professional analysis.

i am such a softy. i just called him "shorty" hoping the other nasty kids may pick up on it and make him slightly miserable. i am so nice.

anyway --- in conclusion education is not a business. kill charter schools.

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Monday, October 19, 2015

GOEBBELS LIVES.
LIEING ON MSNBC: AYMAN MOHYELDIN

"NBC News reporter Ayman Mohyeldin was corrected on-air yesterday after a live report that implied a Palestinian terrorist who charged at officers brandishing a knife didn’t have a weapon on him."

so called nbc reporter is a propaganda plant for palestinians and muslims. nbc didn't correct him the other day for over a period of an hour until truth was somewhat revealed. he made out that an innocent young palestinian was shot in the back by israeis. the innocent young palestinian broke through a secure checkpoint in a camouflaged shirt wielding a knife in one hand and some other item (not identified yet) in the other and threatened others ran down to a gate for tourists and visitors with these weapons and was shot.

why is this person still employed by nbc when others have been fired for much, much, much less. i see christiane amanpour (cbe) is still around also. get rid of her - another liar.

"MSNBC reporter Ayman Mohyeldin had to be corrected on-air on Wednesday..."

fox news seemed to be the only network who got this story straight.

i watched this story unfold for over an hour. the only thing i was impressed by was the loyalty of jose diaz ballart trying his best to make excuses for this scumbag mohyeldin. does anyone else on msnbc have the cajones to tell it as it is?


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Sunday, October 18, 2015

SCARIEST FICTIONAL SCENE FOR ME

in the book catch 22 (1961) there is a segment called the man in white. it describes a wounded soldier in a hospital bandaged from head to toe. he presumably receives nutrients via a clear liquid through a tube connected to an I V.

another tube connected to a bag on the floor collects a clear fluid from the man in white. a nurse periodically switches bags.

eventually they take him away presumably dead.

although i read this book over 50 years ago this scene remains with me.

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having been in the hospital and icu several times last year i can tell you similar stuff like this happens all the time.

never mind.

have a good day. yea, yea, yea.

GO JETS. GO GIANTS.

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Wednesday, October 14, 2015

DEM DEBATE?

deliberately missed the dem. debate yesterday. i'm drowning in political bs.

whatever hillary says just doesn't matter: her day trading of cattle futures and making a lot of money is enough proof of her character.
at least donald trump would probably say he knew some powerful people who can do this.

if i vote it will probably be an against republican vote.

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Wednesday, October 7, 2015

BIG PHARMA BS? MILK BAD FOR YOU?

an article on the internet this morning said that milk from another species is bad for you (cows are not people although corporations are.) and if you're not a baby all milk is bad for you.

as you know all cheese, ice cream, and butter and many cakes, cookies, sauces, etc. are made from milk.

does anyone out there besides big pharma know what they're doing? i doubt it.
we can sell you a pill which can neuter milk for ... ummm .. $1000 a month.
thanks suckerrrrrrrr's.

can republicans really sell you on this crap? i guess so.

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Tuesday, October 6, 2015

OUR MAGNIFICENT ESTATE

my wife's family owned a house in eastern europe over 100 years ago. out of curiosity we visited the town about 20 years ago. the authorities knew of the pre-nazi, pre-communist ownership.

two reasons we didn't press our ... ummm ... rights if we had any were:
who wants a house in eastern europe bastardland and the possible division of a house sale at that time was very little. not worth any effort.

i sorta' did a very rough calculation dividing the number of possible heirs (500?) into my estimated value of the house although appearing well maintained in a sorta' remote east european town and came up with about $20 american.

the people actually living in the house may have claims for their improvement of the property or some other stuff. i wouldn't be surprised if pressing our claim would cost our family a lot. also eastern europeans may want to kill us besides.

never mind. keep it!

.........i know nothing.............

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Monday, October 5, 2015

NEW KITCHEN LIGHT FIXTURE

i guess i appear to be a mentally and physically falling apart old man. every one wants to help me. the sales person at the store asked me about putting in the new fixture. i told him i know it is very complicated, "you put the black wire with the black wire, the white wire with the white wire and the ground wire with the ground screw or ground wire". i know this is very tough for phd scientists and engineers but i'm a genius.

drum roll....

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Saturday, October 3, 2015

TRUMP, TRUMP, TRUMP

i'm starting to think trump could do just as good a job at foreign relations and defense as the presidents back to and including reagan.

in trump's defense dept.:
sec'y of defense elmer fudd
sec'y of air force bugs bunny
other top positions should include, wiley coyote, daffy duck, et al.
and porky pig for leader of the house of rep.
nevermind

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Friday, October 2, 2015

DISAPPOINTMENT

doing my best to become a skins fan in addition to my personal favorites, giants and jets. skins have disappointed me game after game. i might as well stick with the ny/nj teams, win or lose. sorry, skins.

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Thursday, October 1, 2015

SANDERS RUNNNG WELL FOR DEMOCRATIC NOMINATION

people think he'll never get his agenda legislated because of republican strength in the congress.

clearly if sanders gets nominated and elected president all the bizarre gerrymandering, supreme court rulings, and all the king's horses and all the king's men will not be able to put the republican congress together again.

i'd be relieved that their twisted, untrue views of reality would be thrown out with the garbage.

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