FIRST KING OF THE UNITED STATES

dateline january 2117:

king donald I, master of nothingness ascended the throne 100 years ago this month at his inauguration. it was the people's desire to devolve to the level of islamic extremists. a form of fighting fire with fire. today we are terrorist free primarily because of the artificial intelligence of the iPhone LCCCXVIII. our new king, coronated today, JEB! III will certainly strengthen us. DEATH TO THE EVIL ONES!!!!!

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dateline dec. 7 2015

repubs are trying to get rid of trump:

I don't understand how you can swift boat trump because he never did anything. you'll have to attack his obvious nothingness. his nothingness is less than others' nothngness. he's more nothing than a black hole/outer space/my bank account/my comments/the invisible man/my job/obama's isis strategy/gop's isis strategy/faux news commentary (exclude shepard smith)/arab sincerity ------ never mind.

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